5 SIGNS YOU NEED TO CHANGE YOUR FRIENDSHIP CIRCLE
“Don’t make friends who are comfortable to be with. Make friends who will force you to lever yourself up.”– Thomas J. Watson
Change is not easy but can be very necessary sometimes. The kind of people (friends) we keep, determine who we become, because they influence us in several ways: from the partners we keep, the trends we start to follow to the television shows we watch.
We always talk about toxic relationships with our co-workers, our boss, our significant others but we can have toxic relationships with our friends too and only you have the power to change that.
Here are subtle signs your friends are toxic and you need to let them go:
- Your friendship is one-sided: When your friendship feels more like a business transaction than a friendship then it may be time to let them go. In such friendships, you realise you cannot go to them for the same things they come to you for and they almost disappear when things are going well for them.
- They gossip about you: There is a saying that goes like this: The people who talk to you about others will talk to others about you. This is the case with toxic friends. On countless occasions, you have been told by your other friends that your friend says mean things about you and you have even seen it with your own eyes and kept making excuses for them. Take this as a sign and cut that person loose.
- Too much drama: We all have that friend who loves drama and it can be funny in the beginning but when this person goes overboard every time and keeps dragging you into other people’s drama then they are not good enough to be in your circle. Such friends expect you to hate the people they hate just as proof of your loyalty to them.
- You ditch your values for them: Do you find yourself telling lies more than usual? Or helping your friend hide secrets from their significant other when you know you shouldn’t? It is time to let go. A friend who forces you to do things you are not comfortable with is not a good friend. Real friends will not support you when you do things that are not noble.
- Your gut feelings: Time and time again, we feel in our guts “something is just off about a particular thing or person”. This is where we need to sit back and evaluate this friendship. Our instincts have a way warning us but we brush them off only to realise they were right all along. Do not be so quick to ignore your gut feelings.
TAKE ACTION: It is time to evaluate the friendships you have and ask yourself some tough questions.
- Is this friendship making me a better person?
- Why am I associating myself with them?
- What impact have they had on my life since we became friends?
When you do these, you get a clear idea of which of your friends are keepers and which ones to let go for your peace of mind and sanity.